Monday, December 1, 2014

Hello motherhood!

Alhamdulillah! Nov 20th was the day everything changed. Why? There my baby girl, Kinanti Sofia Rakanata was born through c- section surgery (because I was diagnosed with pre eklampsia). It's somewhat amazing being a mother, breastfeed, and try to communicate and understand what your child wants through their language (which most of the time is crying).

Everyday is a new day with her and this is what I have been waiting for 9 months of pregnancy, a very cute little angel :)

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Heading (to be) in labor

Juggling through this week heading for the 3 months maternity leave. 
It's all in my head. You know? Maybe you don't, that's OK. I'm trying to get ready with anything. My hospital bag (i'm preparing one-this week). Cleaning spaces for (insyaAllah) when my baby comes home. I just did research on my soon-to-be giving birth hospital. I try to move from the very mainstream hospital (where i was born, and my mother gave birth to me and other children). And it turns out good, because the hospital is kind of new, and just open about 1,5 years ago. It's clean, spacious, (not so) pricey, near to my house. Almost all the things that me and husband want. Let's get ready! How about making one video about "Get Ready With Me - Giving Birth Edition?" I don't think so.

After almost 1 month, moving from one room flat (kost), it's kind of better to stay at a house (lookalike). I can barely cook (not everyday), sleep in a different room, where i watch TV and eat (i have dining table with two chairs - how good it can be?), and also i'm not afraid to kept the leftover of food (because i have fridge) and also i can save money by cooking lunch & breakfast. Fab! Trying to enjoy my 3 weeks routine. Awake at 4.45AM, then pray, and cook for breakfast & lunch, and cut some fruits to be eaten at office :) nice, right? on a normal day, i did that. On a very lazy day, i just do my usual routine. Awake, bath, and off we go! no brekkie & lunch cooking. No. Being on pregnancy actually reminding me to walk slowlier and move on a small portion. Not a rushed one, just like i used to do :(

Monday, October 13, 2014

Humid Sensation

Last night was hot. Literally. I mean, i don't have any air con yet, because all the budget were taken away for house and labor preparation. So, me and husband have to deal with fan a.k.a kipas angin. And, honestly that's kind of hard. Because, since we were married one year ago, we already used to live in air con life style. Well, before i was married, i don't really care about using any air con, but when i'm pregnant like this, seriously humid and hot weather is becoming a serious issue :) 

By the way, i cooked for lunch today and bring it to office. Phew! Little did i know, cooking in the morning, though it's just kind of simple menus, it will drain your energy (plus because it's humid and hot inside my house). Yet, at night i didn't sleep really well.  Now, i know how my mother struggle every morning just to prepare lunch for all of us at home. And, she cooked some kind of serious menu like semur ayam, semur daging, ayam goreng. etc (well, i only cooked oseng wortel baso and chicken nugget -  and now i nag like a little spoiled kid. Man, that's hard!)

Let's see if we can make it on time to go home!

Thursday, October 9, 2014

the relationship

This morning is a mess. Very crazy traffic. Need 2 and half hours from my house to get my ass here in the office. Craziness.  
Stumbling upon my old John Mayer's playlist from Heavier Things while working on some project. Remember the song "Daughters" from John Mayer?
For me, it's a very "gue banget" song since it's kinda related to me, and the relationship with me and my father. No, my father doesn't left me alone, yet we just don't have that kind of "father daugther good relationship" and that makes me realize what are written in "Daughters" lyric, is really related with my life. And yes, i guess it's true how daughters or girls relationship with their parents especially fathers will affect their relationship with their spouse/boyfriend in the future.

So it's kind of true, that Mayer said :

Fathers, be good to your daughter. Daughter will love like you do

And it means, if your father is leaving you, abandon you, or abusing you, probably in the future, you will have issues with your future boyfriend or spouse, because deep inside your heart, you will be considering every man will treat you, just like your father did. There's fear that will always be there. Wondering and full of doubt.

I don't know. Well, that song kind of succeed bring tears into my eyes. That "cirambay" moments.

Friday, October 3, 2014

I'm a morning person (now)

Good Morning!

Literally morning :) Because i'm posting from my office desktop on 7.51 AM. 
In fact, i arrived at office on 7.00 AM sharp. Already had my breakfast, morning tea, minus vitamin for my little one (i'll grab one soon). Standing ovation, anyone? :)

Right now, i'm so thankful to Allah SWT for all His blessings that comes like pouring rain. Me and husband now live near my parents' house (yes, pregnancy and labor cause) in a small space with 2 bedrooms, bathroom, living room, and kitchen (yay, i can cook!). Thank God we don't have to spend 2.5 million IDR per month anymore (yes, that's the cost of my kost room in South Jakarta). I already fill my house with some furnitures, like spring bed, television, fridge and everything. Also, today the furniture shop called to say that my closet, TV table, and also the most thing that i waited is dining set - which are one glass table with 2 chairs will  be arrived today. It's a super yayness for me! Alhamdulillah :) 

The little one is Insya Allah on her (or his) way (I'm 33 weeks now). I actually already know about the gender, but i don't know why, i will believe as soon as i see her (or him) with my own eyes. Silly, yes i know. Hopefully she or he will come out healthy and every process will be easy. Labor pain is something that i actually afraid and think most of the time, yet i shall just believe Allah SWT will make everything easier for His people. Amin. 

Let's cheers because it's Friday! :)

Monday, September 15, 2014

Soon to be (Insya Allah)

Selamat (tidak begitu) pagi .. 

Pagi ini dimulai dengan jadwal meeting yang mendadak diganti karena kepentingan beberapa orang. Sebel? Ah, nggak juga. Biasa saja. Sudah sering sih di-PHP-in begini. 

Oiya, ternyata begini ya, rasanya galau. Bukan masalah cinta kok. There will always be first time for everything, wise man said. Galau karena mau melahirkan gitu. Rasanya itu seperti ya, seneng karena akan menjalani kehidupan sebagai ibu (insya Allah), kemudian deg-deg-an karena belum pernah melahirkan sebelumnya. Well, saya coba cari tahu sih, sebenarnya melahirkan itu prosesnya seperti apa, tapi tetep aja, yang namanya rasa pertama kali itu kan lain ya. Banyak belum tahu nya. Saya juga sudah siapkan sedikit-sedikit keperluan si calon bayi itu (yang kata dokter perempuan- Amin), mulai dari baju, celana, sepatu, kaus kaki, kaus tangan, handuk, gurita, selimut dan lain-lain. Rasanya nggak sabar ingin segera memakaikan semua itu di badan dia. Menurut saya, feeling seperti ini tuh rasanya seperti masuk sekolah hari pertama, well not exactly sih.  Tapi, ya begitu. Oiya, campur feeling mau menikah juga. Wondering apakah makanan dan minuman cukup, acaranya berjalan lancar, atau tidak. Begitulah kira-kira. Menunggu dua bulan lagi, rasanya cukup lama juga. Selain itu moment USG atau check-up ke dokter kandungan, adalah saat yang paling ditunggu-tunggu. Karena disitu kita bisa melihat si calon bayi sedang apa. Terakhir, USG ke dokter kandungan, si calon bayi posisi nya terlentang atau melintang, dan sedang main gelembung (entah apa itu - mungkin semacam udara) dengan mulutnya. Subhanallah, rasanya luar biasa. Excited banget. Jadi ingat, waktu Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes akan punya anak, Tom Cruise nekat ingin membeli mesin USG dan membawa pulang ke rumah, supaya ia bisa mengontrol dan melihat perkembangan bayinya. Walaupun akhirnya dilarang oleh pihak yang berwenang. Pantas saja, gini banget rasanya - ingin melihat perkembangan si bayi :)

Mudah-mudahan semuanya berjalan lancar. Amin. FYI, estimated delivery date -nya per akhir November 2014. Bismillah.

Tuesday, September 9, 2014


Minggu ini banyak cobaannya.

Mulai dari didiemin sama atasan tanpa sebab musabab yang jelas. Menunggu kepastian dari institusi finansial. Masih mencari tempat tinggal dekat orang tua dan menunggu dikonfirmasi oleh empunya kontrakan. Dan masalah en de bre prikitilan lainnya.

Ternyata kebanyakan mikir juga bikin saya stress dan jadi pusing. Apalagi sekarang ada calon bayi, saya gak mau dia kenapa-kenapa gara-gara pikiran saya yang ngalor ngidul.

Mungkin ini minggu yang penuh cobaan. Alhamdulillah Allah masih sayang sama saya dengan terus menguji kesabaran saya. Mudah-mudahan ini cepat berlalu dan membuahkan hasil yang baik :) Amin.

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Today's Thing

Here comes the usual daily problems of company slavery :)
We, sometimes, have a boss or senior or whatever but we do have to realize yang namanya kerja sama orang itu pasti ada ups and downs nya. 

Well, i ain't blaming no one on this case ya, but i think, yes we sure do have emotional matters or attach when we connect with someone.Here's the case is when one of my colleague is resigning from the job because he/she felt hurtful with the words that the boss said. And he/she thought that he/she needed to resign and reactive to the comment or words. So he/she was absent like 2 weeks without notice and ignoring all of her/his responsibilities. So, when it comes to HR they called he/she to come to office to explain what is actually going on. Then after 2 weeks missing, he/she came and directly talked to HR explained everything. But unfortunately the boss, wanted her/him to resign ASAP if he/she didn't want to work anymore - considering the missing action for 2 weeks. And at that day, he/she directly resigned and left the office, also in my opinion, bad mark for her/his future. Because, the missing in action, and let's be honest people in FMCG are friends in some ways or somehow. They do TALKED about you. Behind your back. Sometimes, neglecting your resume.

I have worked in 3 different companies (4 if i may say), and i think that being ignorant to something is actually useful in some case. You know, kerja sama orang is not always good and smooth, especially if we are the Rantai Makanan Paling Bawah thingy. It will always hard to ask someone to adjust with what we wants, in fact, no body would - UNLESS you are the CEO, director, or orang yang udah kerja puluhan tahun di company itu. So, in my opinion, that my friend should have been more patience and need to be IGNORANT.  Why? because when we are attacked or abused verbally (man, office bullying is like our daily snack), sometimes we don't really need to hear and feel it very deeply. Because, i believe, a boss (somewhere in this world) is actually not a person you can change. I mean, you wish with your action (like missing for 2 weeks) she will felt sorry and realized that she was wrong, but in fact, she is not and she's never be sorry for that. So, it's useless. You felt hurt and she felt that she need to go with another punishment because you already missing for 2 weeks. 

Well, who am i to judge? But i'm just sharing my opinion with you, who read this. That there's no such thing as KERJAAN ENAK. But, if you decide so, then you can conquer every place that you worked for and make it as your dream job (that actually paid your bill). No matter how long you go for nyari kerjaan enak, bos enak, or whatever enak. Man, gak ada kerjaan enak, the only thing exist is you enjoy your job, and make it as best as you can. Karena seenak-enaknya kerjaan, you already got the good boss, and good salary, and good distant for work, tiba-tiba bos nya resign dan diganti bos  baru yang gak enak, atau tiba-tiba ada restrukturisasi dan kerjanya dipindahin jadi jauh. Expect nothing but change!

I gotta go back to that meeting. Yes, i sneaked out. 

See you ! Cheers!

Sunday, August 10, 2014

When I was ..

When I was pregnant 1- 3 months, I felt this. All I want was being lazy, snuggle and do nothing. Glorious.

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Updating my Blog :)


Just updating my life :) 
It has been weeks and days since the last time i updated my blog. Now, my pregnancy has enterted 6 months or 24 weeks. Alhamdulillah. It's a blessing really, being a pregnant lady. 
Knowing that you're not alone  in every single thing that you do. The sickness and nausea has gone. Alhamdulillah. My appetite for eating is like really, for two. Great. My family & husband being great, supporting in every single thing that i do. Last month, when i did my regular obgyn visit, the doctor said that my baby is a girl. Hopefully :) so i can play dress up with her :) Insha Allah. 

We've just finished Ramadhan month. My first time Ramadhan in pregnant condition and have a husband. So it's kind of different, but i like it. The other thing which different is my grandma, Uti, is no longer here. She left us 9 months ago, Insha Allah in a better place. It does made me sad, and really this Idul Fitri is very different, since i have passed 25 years of my former Idul Fitri, where we always gather as full team family member.

I have new look right now, Insha Allah it will bring me to become a better person. Everyday is a new journey and lesson. 


Thursday, April 24, 2014

New journey. Bismillah.

Hi people!

Having bad nausea and throw up in a row. Its been quite though tho. But I believe its a blessing in disguise.

I have to stay strong for my little human inside. Because ive just seen or maybe heard (not sure) :p his/her heartbeat when I paid visit to my obgyn. Its a wonderful things! Subhanallah. How God works in so many wonders that happen in my life.

Allah swt stays with me. I know.

Sunday, April 13, 2014

All the morning sickness ..

Ola people!

So these past few weeks, I spent my whole day with my morning sickness and well not only morning but like whenever it pleased to stop by on me haha :) well I feel happy tho, bcos its a blessing from God anyway.

I was happy today because today I went to mall (where else?) And spent my day ate burgers w/o soda and watched The Raid 2. Its a great day with husband and the sickness and nausea kinda far away from me today. Alhamdulillah :)

Hope your weekend is as good as mine ;) not faking it that im kinda upset tomorrow is monday but yeah we got long weekend this week :) another reason to thank God, aight?

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

HELLO! Finally a post :)


It's been ages! i know i know. I probably fast forward time and fall asleep :) 
Well, life's been treating me good (Nikmat Tuhanmu manakah yang kau dustakan?) Alhamdulillah. 

Work? try to adjust everytime, swallow anger and unimportant emotional matters. Family? Just met on sunday celebrating belated birthday. Me & husband? Going pretty smooth, sprinkles with little rocks and sharp edges. Well, aren't all married couple are? Make up life? Fabulous!

I am now using my desktop at office. Cause i dont own any computer at home. Just love to type in computer rather than phone. I shall be posting  many more (thanks God, my browser has been changed and upgraded). Make up post, i have some, rambles & rants oh yes, please. And also my personal stuff and duff. 

That's it for now. Have a great Tuesday :)